Reflections

As the year draws to a close and I reflect on its events, I must say that I have just let it go on by without achieving anything. Well maybe I’m being a bit harsh but real and truly, I am not impressed with myself.

Ok, maybe I have achieved something, because I did move to Ghana as I said I would (plus other things). However, scary and challenging that has been for me, I did it and I am proud of myself.

But, 2011 was supposed to be my year of elevation…and guess what I had every opportunity to make it just that but what happened? I allowed FEAR and self doubt to overcome me!

You know for someone that is always preaching self belief, I really messed up! And this is the lesson here guys, we have to be careful to not lose focus and allow our own thoughts to deceive us. I admit, the year has not been that bad in terms of achievement but in my personal growth, I feel defeated because I allowed, the fear of conforming stop me in an area where I know I can succeed and be an individual.

On a lighter note, I am happy and grateful for this year because I feel elevated in my spirit and feel am getting closer to finding myself. I have grown a lot and matured along with it. I have learned to let go and let God, and am learning to face the truth and deal with it instead of locking it inside and being bitter.

I have elevated in my romantic life to…you know before so long, I have been afraid to love because the only man I ever loved left me when I need him most, my daddy (may his soul rest in peace). I have always found an excuse not to open up and allow myself to be vulnerable because I was not ready for the rollercoaster of a relationship. But now, I feel that I am ready to love and to be loved because it is my right to be loved and to be loved right.

I have elevated also in the knowledge of loving myself…enough to say NO to the people who want to exploit me in many ways than one. I love the fact that I don’t know it all and love the journey I’m on to gaining this knowledge. I love and accept the fact I am unique in my flaws as well as my perfections. I am not the wealthiest; I’m not from the perfect family, but then again who is? I accept my position in life and I am ready and willing to make it full and great.

You know, last year if you had heard the way I talked, you would commend the level of maturity that I am speaking with. I sounded like a fool but who can blame, even the bible says when I was a child, I spoke like a child…but now that I am old…well you get it.

Look, although this year did not turn out entirely as I’d hoped in the ways that I’d hoped, I am still grateful for all the lessons and growth that has occurred. Please, take it from me, it don’t matter how old you are or where you are in life, taking time out to assess yourself is very important because things may not actually be as they seem.

Self growth is the key to living a purpose filled life…if you are living a lie, how can your life reflect God’s Will and purpose in your life?